When you’re trying to figure out if a shorter engagement is better or if you should make it longer, it’s important to know all the positive aspects of waiting before tying the knot.
Learn the best reasons for a long engagement and decide for yourself if waiting is the best option for you and your fiancé. From removing a lot of the pressure when it comes to planning the wedding and paying for everything to a few emotional benefits, here’s why a long engagement might be the right way to go.
Having the Time to Enjoy Being Engaged
Most brides barely get to know how being engaged feels like because they’re too wrapped up in the wedding planning. Taking the time to enjoy this step in your life is important, especially if you haven’t dated for that long before deciding that you were meant for each other.
Getting to Really Know Each Other
If you opt for a short engagement after a few months of dating, you don’t really know the guy you’re marrying. You might know he’s a good person, but you don’t know how compatible you really are before you actually go through many different experiences together. That’s one of the best reasons for a long engagement, because getting a divorce is a lot harder and more hurtful than breaking up.
Reducing the Wedding Stress
Planning a wedding can get very stressful even when you have plenty of time to take care of every detail. When you’re constantly stuck in wedding planning mode, your relationship can take a back seat, and that’s never a good idea this early on. Without a strict wedding planning timeline, you can take a break from the planning anytime you feel like it, so it’s a lot less stressful.
Discovering Dealbreakers Before It’s Too Late
One of the best reasons for a long engagement is figuring out if you’re really on the same page as your fiancé when it comes to the really important things. For instance, he may say that he wants kids “sometime in the future”, but having over a year to think about the future can actually make him realize he does want kids or he does not. If this is a dealbreaker for you, it’s much better to know about it before getting married.
Reducing Wedding Expenses
A long engagement doesn’t just give you more time to save money for your dream wedding, it can also help you get better prices. Even if you want a small wedding, it’s better to have over a year to save the money instead of trying to get everything sorted out in a few months or getting in debt for a long time.
More: The Secrets Happy Couples Have in Common
Working Out Any Kinks
Learning how you actually relate to each other and how you communicate outside of the honeymoon period is one of the best reasons for a long engagement. Now is the time to see what works and what doesn’t in your relationship and to figure out how you can improve the things that aren’t compatible with a long term happy couple.
Getting the Wedding You Really Want
For many brides, having too much time to plan can lead to second guessing and major changes. Don’t look at it like that. Instead, a longer engagement can help you figure out what kind of wedding you really want. Another plus is that you get first dibs on booking the perfect venue.
Having Time to Grow
If you’re really young and so is your fiancé, giving yourselves time to grow is one of the best reasons for a long engagement. You don’t always know what you want in life right after graduating high school, and some people only get to know themselves in their 30s. Don’t rush it just because you’re excited about how it feels to be married.
More: Help Him Overcome His Fear of Commitment
Fixing Any Bad Credit Issues
When one of you has a bad credit record, you’ll both get stuck with it as a couple. Whether it’s getting rid of credit card debt or paying student loans, fixing financial issues before making it official is wise.
Increasing Your Chances for a Longer Marriage
While there are no studies that completely confirm the connection between the length of engagement and that of marriage, anecdotal evidence still points to the fact that one of the best reasons for a long engagement is knowing and accepting how your life together will be like. If you go in unprepared, you might regret it.
