Trusting your instinct on the first date with a guy is very important. Even if you should give him a real chance, some warning signs show you that giving him another chance probably won’t pay off.
Check out some of the biggest first date red flags, and decide for yourself if a single one or a combination of a few is enough to dismiss a guy altogether. Sometimes a bad day can make him act unlike himself on the first date, but most of the time these signs show some deeper issues that might make him wrong for you.
1. He Drinks Too Much
Sticking to a two drink maximum is a wise choice for both of you on the first date. Unless you’ve known each other for a long time, it’s disrespectful to get too tipsy or outright sloppy drunk. It doesn’t mean he necessarily has a problem with alcohol, but it does mean that he doesn’t respect you enough.
2. He Won’t Let Go of His Phone
One of the biggest first date red flags is the fact that he pays attention to his phone. Again, this is disrespectful on the first date, and it can show you two things. He’s either really preoccupied with his work and he’ll never really put you first, or he’s not that into you, so he doesn’t really care what you think.
3. He Wants to Get Too Personal
Whether you met him online or a friend set you up on a blind date, it’s rude to ask a stranger very personal questions on the first date. This is the first time you’re exploring each other’s boundaries and if he seems to be walking all over yours, that’s not a good sign in the long run. He shouldn’t ask for a detailed look at your sexual and emotional history, and you shouldn’t offer too much on it on the very first date.
4. Getting Too Explicit
Being flirty in a way that you’re both enjoying is always a good sign when you go out together for the first time is great. However, getting too explicit about sex can be one of the first date red flags. If you’re just looking for a hookup, then it’s perfectly fine, but when you’re on a date-date getting too involved in sexual details or making lewd remarks is a turn off for a very obvious reason.
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5. He Wants to Trash Talk His Ex
There’s a big line between being open about your last relationship and going on a rant about how awful your ex was. If he shows anger and bitterness for his ex, he either hasn’t moved on, or he that’s simply how he is. Beware of guys who say they never stay friends with their exes. You’ll soon join that list of women he never wants to see again.
6. He’s Rude to Others During the Date
The way he acts towards strangers and the waiting staff during your date is a much bigger clue to who he really is than the way he acts with you. If he’s rude or disrespectful to others, that’s one of the huge first date red flags. He may be able to play nice with a woman he’s interested in, but that’s not his real personality.
7. He Seems Like the Perfect Match
Everyone tries to put their best self forward on the first date, but you be wary when things just don’t add up. If he has a great job, seems like a great guy, yet he’s never really had a long term relationship, there’s something wrong.
8. He’s Very Critical Towards You
Expecting to be treated with respect is perfectly reasonable, so one of the biggest first date red flags is the fact that he doesn’t seem to accept your choices or opinions. If he’s being judgmental from the very first date, you don’t want him in your life.
9. He’s Too Competitive
When for every detail you share about yourself, he chimes in with a bigger and better one, that’s a bad case of oneupmanship. He may not be lying, but he’s certainly not relationship material if dating seems like a competition, and he always think he has the more interesting story, constantly bringing the conversation back to him.
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10. He Blames Others for His Failures
He doesn’t get a promotion because his boss hates him or he flunked a class because the teacher was grading subjectively? One of the most obvious first date red flags is the fact that he doesn’t seem to take responsibility. When you see the pattern of placing blame on everything but himself, run away.
